MarlaJane, my blogging buddy on the east coast, picks a word to live by each year. It’s a habit of loosely adopted over the years, though this last year I really tried to live by that word. Last year, the word was “go.” I was feeling tired of never making changes, never moving forward, of feeling hesitant, and so forth. So go.
This last year was wildly difficult for me on so very many fronts. In fact, I can publicly claim that it was the hardest year ever for me. And yes, I’d even say that a lot of that had to do with going. I finally bit the bullet and got braces (I hit my one-year mark in two weeks!), I finally started my masters program (halfway end of Feb!), I finally got serious about my health (lost 7 pounds and dropped 10 points on the BMI scale!), and I’m finally making serious progress in other areas of life that I won’t talk about here because, well, that’s personal. 🙂
But it was a year filled with going, and I’m looking back now and thinking, “Dang… That was a lot!”
So the word this year…. Well, I was sitting in Sacrament Meeting on Sunday. I was conducting, and because it was fast Sunday that meant I would get to bear my testimony. A lot of the time, I feel very clearly what I should bear my testimony about, but this time I just wasn’t finding anything. As I took the Sacrament, I read my patriarchal blessing and, as I often do, my journal. I was reminded of just how much has happened, how hard it has been, how far I’ve come, and how much still has to happen. And then I felt… overwhelming gratitude. Both for the experiences and trials that led to the growth, but also for the people around me who have stayed faithful and lifted me. I told some good friends of mine last night that they have held my head above water in very real ways this last year, and the truth is I could say that about so many people. It’s just been a great and miraculous year in the midst of all the storms and the trials.
So what is my word?