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Archive for the ‘Random Reachings’ Category

First, I’m not sure there is any point to this post except to say that I felt the need to write. There, you’ve been warned.

Second, I’m really not sure I could ever explain away my cowlick. I’m not sure what perfect storm of genetic information collided to form the cowlick on the front of my head, but it’s a monstrocity.

And I love it.

A barber once examined it because he thought it was so interesting. He counted seven individual cowlicks that combined to create a perfect whirlpool of hair right in the front and a little to the right. The upper portion sticks straight up, almost as if I had decided to feather my hair in a really weird place.

I’ll never forget the time a coworker told me, jokingly of course, that he wanted to use my cowlick as one of those punch posts for stacking receipts or notes. The exact phrase used the word “unicorn” if that helps give you an idea. While you might doubt the actual functionality of my cowlick to do that, you really should take a good look at it some time. It makes Calvin from Calvin & Hobbes look positively well groomed.

Because of it, I’ve kept my hair cut very short for almost six years now. It’s just easier to maintain and control when my hair is very short. The last time I cut my hair, though, I dropped the clippers and broke the face plate. Ah, the choice…. Do I spend $20 and replace the clippers or grow my hair out? Decisions, decisions, decisions.

Seemingly a small choice for sure, but with all the changes in life lately, it only seems appropriate that the “horn” should be reborn.

Courtney will be happy; she likes to twirl her fingers around the whirlpool-edge of the cowlick. As for me, I’m going to see if I can’t get some part-time work as a unicorn or, at the very least, a punch post for a pile of receipts somewhere.

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A happy song

My family is strangely talented in that not one of us really shares a talent. We’re all fairly talented singers, writers, cooks, and so on, but we each are exceedingly blessed in unique ways. My brother’s talent is music, and here’s a link to a song he recently created and submitted as a demo.

Pretty good if you ask me.

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It’s been a while since I’ve done something really random, so here we go….

Everyone has at least one voice they can imitate perfectly. I have two, both of which are extraordinarily odd and you’ll never get me to do them unless you catch me  off guard. The first is Bullwinkle from the Rocky & Bullwinkle show of yesteryear. If you can’t remember him, he’s the moose that is always saying stuff like, “Watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat.”

But Bullwinkle impersonations have nothing on my second voice. If you catch me off guard, I can do a perfect, and I do mean perfect, imitation of none other than…

Miss Piggy.

And I think we’ll leave it at that.

What’s your voice?

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Late February and early March are always some of my favorite times of the year. This is that time when you find yourself looking out the window and just sighing… you know it’s coming.

I don’t know what it is about Spring, but I get almost giddy when I see the buds on the trees and the tulips poking through the ground. Easter is easily my second favorite holiday right after Christmas, and, at certain times, it is my favorite. There’s just something very natural to me about thinking of the Savior and remembering His life when you see the world renewed and reborn each Spring. Something special and happy.

Our tulips are about 2 inches tall now, and the daffodils are poking out as well. All the trees on my daily lunch walk are starting to poke the first hints of leaves out, and the grass has perked up a little and greened a lot. It all makes me want to dig my hands deep into the earth and feel the vibrancy of life and growth under my feet.

Yes, it is Spring again, and despite the snow flurries that are surely still to come, you can smell the life in the air.

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We have complicated taxes. Really. If it weren’t for our rentable basement, we’d have simple taxes, but because of the rental, we have complicated taxes.

For the last two years, I’ve gone to H&R Block to do my taxes. They do a great job; the only catch is that I have to leave my leg behind. Or an arm. Last year, they charged me $343 to do my taxes, and the person preparing them spent a good hour with support people to figure out how to do it all. I decided if HR Block required help, I might as well try it one my own this year using TaxAct software.

Long story short: after spending nearly two hours battling my way through page after page of information, I realized I was hopelessly lost and drowning. And it’s not that TaxAct failed me. Oh no. No, it was the absolute complexity of figuring out depreciation on the rental unit downstairs. See, what I can’t figure out is how we get XX in income off the basement but only count 25% of that toward taxes. At least that is what HR Block has done the last two years. It has to do with the depreciation of the rental, but for us, the difference between XX and 25% of XX means more than $1,000 on our refund.

And that’s worth paying $343 to HR Block to do my taxes.

But here’s my real problem: Why is the tax system so blasted hard anyway? I should be able to do it all on my own, and truth be told, if we didn’t have the rental, I could. I can see why some of the alternate tax systems out there, like the flat tax, are attractive.

My personal favorite, even though I know it would never fly, is the Sales Tax method. The basic idea is that ALL taxes are done away with (that’d be nice). In their place, we institute a sales tax on all purchases of, for this example, say, 25%. So if you buy $1 worth of something, you pay $1.25. Most people cringe when they hear that, but remember, you aren’t paying ANY other taxes. None. Just 25% of whatever you buy.

The main advantages I see with this is that it removes the sheltering options and complexity of the tax system. It also encourages saving and investment. If you don’t want to pay taxes, don’t spend your money. Simple as that.

The main disadvantages are the immediate black market for under-the-table goods and, of course, a disparity in what is paid by poor vs. rich. While no one portion of society would pay more or less than 25% on purchases made, your effective tax rate would likely be lower as you became richer. For example, if you make $1,000 and spend it, you paid $250 in taxes. If you make $10,000 and spend $1,000, you still paid $250 in taxes which, in this example, is a tenth the total tax burden of the first person. The proposals I’ve seen tend to propose income reporting and a straightforward refund for incomes below certain levels. That would help balance the effective tax rates, but it is not a perfect solution.

But personally, the single best thing that could happen to my taxes today would be for this government to get a grip on spending. I have trouble seeing why failing companies needs $800+ billion of my money to support their own failed policies. Instead of giving these companies $800+ billion dollars on top of the hundreds of billions already given out, why not divy that grand total among all Americans. We’ll spend our money at the businesses we support and want to see survive. Let’s see…. $800 billion divided by 300 million people…. That’s a check for $2,666.67 for each person in your house…. Yep, that’d solve it for me.

Of course, giving that kind of cash to most Americans would probably mean that the the jumbo TV industry would become the largest industry in the United States. Me? I’d pay off the car and save the rest.

This has been one of my more unusual ramblings….

There.

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Just a note to start this off. This is my rambling post. I just feel the need. It doesn’t necessarily require a response from you, but my fingers are itching to write, so here I go….

This year has been very weird. Really. We started off the year thinking we were going to move closer to work and recovering from a miscarriage. Now, several months later, we sit on the exact opposite of that spectrum: no move and we’re expecting a baby. In between have been lots of this and lots of thats. Right now we’re in the middle of the “thats.”

We keep trying to move or at least thinking about it, and each time we get distinct impressions that we shouldn’t. But we ask again and the answer is no again. Ask. No. Ask. No. Ask…. The biggest reason we keep asking is that our home is 100 years old and in sore need of a pick me up. We found out tonight that it is part of a historical district. Our home is on the historical registry! Well, at least the neighborhood is. How cool is that? That should offer protection, but it seems like nothing will save this home.

We’ve put a lot of money into it over the last few years, and it’s just at that age where putting any more into it is just not worth it long-term. It’s an uphill battle that, with our limited power, we aren’t going to win. Things just break down faster than we can restore. We’ve contacted a local organization that buys historical homes and fixes them up in an effort to revitalize the neighborhood, but that means we’d have to leave our home. And this isn’t our house… It’s our home. It’s the longest we’ve ever lived, and the home, the ward, the neighborhood… it’s all home.

Given the choice, and I mean this most deeply, I would drive twice as far as the current 85-mile commute if it meant we could keep our home. But the decision is no longer a choice of distance; it’s a choice of ability. Don’t get me wrong; the home has a lot of time left on it’s already aging bones, but it won’t be the Forever Home we have grown to hope for.

Growing up in the military, I fell in love with the land, not the homes. Alaska is home; Germany is home, but the homes we lived in there where just buildings. It wouldn’t surprise me to know that they are gone, and frankly I wouldn’t really care nor would it bother me. But this home…. This is my home. This is the home that has a name (Diamond House so named for the diamond shape of the window in the front door), and the thought that we need to leave it rather than wanting to leave it has, well, it’s put me in a writing mood. It’s my catharsis.

But I’m not giving up yet. We have a whole district of missionaries coming over tomorrow to rip out my weed-filled lawn. And the next week, I’m digging trenches for a sprinkler system. The week after that, I’ll build two raised flower beds and cement them as permanently as I can. And were I to find out that this neighborhood organization agreed to buy our home and was going to have bulldozers start work the very next week, I think I’d still lay new sod and plant flowers and water them all. I’d probably still vacuum and clean the windows. Because it’s home.

Here’s hoping we find the answer to our home so that it can be our home forever. And if not, at least we’ll try.

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Warranty Refund

Did you know that if you bought an extended warranty on a car and then sold the car, you could be eligible for a refund on the unused portion of the warranty? I didn’t. When we bought our car two weeks ago, I had an unused portion of the original warranty that I was just going to throw away. As I was reaching for the trash can, the salesman stopped me and explained that I could get a refund.

Who knew?

So, how much was the refund? Just short of $800. And to think that I almost threw that away without any idea of getting a refund.

If you’ve bought an extended warranty on a car, make sure to ask about a refund when you sell it. You just might be pleasantly surprised!

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Larry? Who’s Larry?

Every few days for almost three weeks now, I get a call from a man who immediately shouts the name “Larry?” whenever I answer the phone. Each time, I tell him that he has the wrong number. He then reads off the number he meant to dial to confirm his information. Each time, the number is exactly correct except for the number 8. He consistently intends to dial a 3, but dials an 8 instead. He then apologizes and hangs up…. and then calls back only seconds later and the process repeats itself. This normally happens at least twice.

I have to wonder at what point this will finally stop. Until then, this whole thing begs the question: who is Larry and is Larry sitting sadly at home waiting for his nameless friend to call him and will this nameless caller ever learn?

Poor Larry.

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Mental illness has always been an area of interest for me because I know so many people who suffer from it. I have many family members and friends with a mental illness of some kind be it Bi-Polar Disorder, OCD, SAD, Depression, and so on. Like most, I’ve always seen mental illness as a trial; however, I recently listened to a lecture that has altered my view point somewhat.

If we accept the reality of a Supreme Being (I do), it is also acceptable to believe that that Being created all things. This would include many things that we consider bad such as AIDS, cancer, mental illness, and (in my case) spiders. I believe that God does nothing random, and if we accept that, we understand that everything has a purpose. Some of these negatives may be destroying angels or devices used to humble us. Others not so. The lecturer suggested that mental illness in particular was a strengthening tool used by God to develop particular talents in particular people.

As I’ve watched my loved ones struggle through mental illness, I don’t think I would ever have called their struggles a strengthening tool. However, now that it was put in that light, I can see that they are generally more empathetic and aware of the struggles that others face. They can also gain enormous strength and confidence in themselves. In particular, my sister who struggles with Bi-Polar and SAD has made enormous leaps and bounds in her own development and growth as a direct result of her battles with her illness. Areas that were once great weaknesses to her are now great strengths because she must focus on them and work on them. Where she was frail, she is now strong, and it is a strength that I will never know because I have never walked that path. As an outsider looking in, I see those changes and idolize her for that growth.

I suppose it really comes down to what you want out of it. Mental illness is not a choice, and you can’t “get over it.” If you could, I’m sure you would. I doubt that anyone wants to feel that way. I doubt that anyone likes to feel that way. But for those who do feel that way, do you see the trial as the Refiner’s Fire or just the Fire? Either way, it’s going to be hot and painful, but one leaves you stronger and more beautiful than before.

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I figured that since I posted five favorite games, I’d better post five games I dislike….

  • Phase 10: I have never once completed a full game of Phase 10. In fact, I think it is a myth that it is even possible to complete a game of Phase 10. For any of you that say it is possible or that you have completed a game, you’re just part of the conspiracy.
  • Stratego: I liked this game as a kid, but I can’t think of a more boring game now. I’m a big strategy-gamed fan (Axis & Allies, Risk, and Monopoly are some of my favorites), but this just isn’t that great. It’s probably more the fact that I dislike most two-player games.
  • Battleship: Yet another two-player game that I don’t like. I’m not big on games that require luck more than anything else. Battleship really is a luck-based game.
  • Twister: I can describe my dislike of this game in two words… Personal Space. Nuf’ said.
  • Settlers of Catan: This is a game that, when it first came out, was an instant favorite. I loved this game. Sadly, like a favorite song, you play it often enough and you get very tired of it. In a few years, I might pick it up again, but I need a break from this one.

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