Dave’s Gardening Corner: Tulips

If you have tulips, you are probably noticing that they are wilting away to nothing about now. If they haven’t started yet, the will soon. Tulips in general don’t survive outdoors beyond the end of May. Of course, this depends heavily on your climate.

You have three options now:

• You can pull your tulips and throw them away.
• You can pull them and store them for next year.
• You can leave them be.

If your tulips produced unsatisfactory results this year, it’s best to pull them now and start over. If you have hybrid tulips, you are only going to get a few good years, so this may be a forced option unless you are letting them spread; Just remember, it takes several years for tulips to start producing good blooms from seed. You can tell a hybrid because they have multiple colors and tend to be much taller than your standard tulip.

The second option is to pull them, prep them, and save them for planting in the fall. This is a good option if you plan on planting in the same bed and are worried that you will damage the bulbs. If you aren’t going to dig that deep, I wouldn’t worry about it since tulip bulbs should be placed about 6 inches down. However, if you do decide to pull them, now is the time. First rule of pulling bulbs for later planting: WAIT UNTIL THEY ARE DONE GROWING! If you pull any earlier, the bulbs won’t have maximum time to replenish their strength, and you won’t have great flowers next year. You might even kill the bulb.
To pull the bulbs, follow the dying foliage down to the bulb. Pull the bulb out and cut away the roots and stalk. Store them in a cool, dark, dry place. It’s really about that simple. You do want to protect them from moisture. A tulip bulb is quite similar to any other bulb (like an onion), and you should treat it the same.

Your last option is, of course, just to leave the tulips in the ground. This is the best option if you aren’t worried about damaging the bulbs or want your tulips to spread naturally. Tulips will, if left alone, take over a well-maintained bed and create a beautiful and thick display. The only thing you really need to do is cut off the dead and dying foliage. You are then free to plant something new on top of the tulips as long as you take care not to damage the underlying bulbs.

Personally, I leave my tulips in the ground. Once they die, I plant something smaller (petunias, marigolds, etc.) over the top. It’s simpler, it helps them spread and grow, and I don’t run the risk of storing them incorrectly. The only time I’d ever pull a tulip is if I noticed that one grew in a bad spot (too close to the sidewalk, house, etc. or under something else). I’d pull that and immediately replant it. Make sure you plant it root-side down (that’s the flatter side).

HANDY TIP FOR PLANTING BULBS: If you are ever confused about which side of a bulb is up, just plant it on its side. The plant knows which way is up and will grow just fine.

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Gifts of Our Fathers

Three in one day…. Must have been a good day.

With Memorial Day approaching, my mind has been turned backwards on those who have gone before. I know that Memorial Day is not specifically a military holiday, but I’ve always pondered a lot on our servicemen and women during this time. My own father was a career Air Force Officer, a gift for which I will be forever grateful. I can’t imagine a better environment to raise a family than a good military home. I’ve hung a flag for as long as I can remember, and my friends all know that I am fiercely patriotic, but I never really hung that flag for my nation. I hung it for my dad. He taught me more about what being American means through his simple actions than anyone else has or could have.

I also think a lot of my maternal grandmother. When I was young, I thought she was “my” grandmother as in mine and mine alone. I always wondered when we were going to visit my other siblings’ grandmothers. We never did. She used to sit with me in this oval shaped wicker chair. It had a red cushion and is one of the few memories that I have that actually has color in it. She would read me stories and rock me to sleep. And she had a scent about her. I’ve never been able to place it, but I remember it like it was yesterday. She is one of the reasons why lilies are some of my favorite flowers.

Memorial Day has never been a big day for celebration for my family. Many head to the mountains, lake, ocean, or whatever. Others just relax at home. Me? I’ve honestly never done anything to recognize the day in any special way. But thinking about all that has been built by those who have gone before makes me feel somewhat ashamed for not at least recognizing their gifts to me. They don’t know me; I don’t know them.

Maybe it’s time to change that.

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The Crying Game

Today, Katherine and I were wrestling and having a good time. Part of wrestling is that one of us gets to be the monster; the other runs away. During this process, we were both running into the kitchen and Katherine managed to squeeze in behind me and get her head bonked on the door frame. It was a pretty good bonk.

I figured that there would be an immediate outburst of tears and crying, but no. She looked around at me and Courtney to make sure we were paying attention, then she hunted down her juice cup. She couldn’t find her blanket, so she asked us to point her in the right direction, which we did. Once she found her blanket, she walked up to Courtney with a straight face, and only then did she commence to scream and howl as though she had been struck down in the prime of life. Only then.

I don’t know about your house, but that is called classic “Faker-boo” in our home. Classic.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer: A Correction

A while back I mentioned that Buffy the Vampire Slayer was a great series. That was the first few seasons. We are now well into season four, and my opinion stands corrected.

The series as a whole is still good and enjoyable, but our dear Buffy and friends have what can only be termed as “major moral issues.” Remove that and I’d stand firm by my first review. With it, I am downgrading the series from 5 out of 5 stars to a solid 2 stars.

In other words, watch the first two season and leave the rest for another day.

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Dave’s Wonderful World of English Usage: A Classic Typo

I always enjoy a good typo. Today at work, I noticed one that was just wonderful.

I  currently work with government surplus auctions. One government agency apparently had some problems with a river flooding on to their municipal golf course. To stem the tide, they bought several large quarried stone blocks that they placed along the edge of the river. Now that the flooding has passed, they want to get rid of the blocks, so they placed them up for auction. Part of the auction listing included this little gem that includes three typos. Two are pretty normal; the other is downright wonderful.

“There blocks were used just over a year ago for damning an area at our Golf Course and we are no longer in need of them.”

The three typos are as follows:

• The word “there” should be “these.”
• There should be a comma separating the two independent clauses.
• The word “damning” should be “damming.”

Of course, all this begs the question. Do they require a special vote on the issue of damning the area, or can you do that with a simple City Council vote?

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The Wonders of Potty Training

Katherine has now hit the wonderful age of potty training. This is a first for all of us, and we are dreading it. We just don’t know where to start or where to begin. We’ve read a lot of websites and done a lot of studying, but this is just a foreign concept to us.

We’ve done most of the standard things like talking about it, showing her the toilet, showing her what it does, emptying her diapers in the toilet, and praising her when she makes any step in that direction. We got to the point where this was all standard in her life, but she wasn’t making that next step. We figured that moving to training pants and buying her a potty would provide that encouragement. That was yesterday.

We let her pick out her own potty, and I was very happy to see her pick out a cute Winnie the Pooh potty. I’ve always loved Winnie the Pooh. One of my favorite sayings comes from a good friend: “A happy child is a child wearing Winnie the Pooh.” I agree. Plus, there was just a certain charm to having a Pooh potty.

During the rest of the shopping trip, Katherine touched, looked at, smiled at, talked to, and otherwise befriended her potty. When we got home, she refused to help carry groceries in like she normally likes to do and instead just sat on the floor looking at her potty. We ended up having to send Courtney off to build the potty while I put away the groceries. When it was built, Katherine immediately jumped on to it, sat down, and even identified it without our help. She even found the flush handle and give it a tug (it says “Good job!!!” and then makes a flushing sound). The fascination continued, and she dragged the potty out to sit on it in the living room. We were so happy and excited. We figured that we had finally broken the hurdle and that the rest of the potty training would be easy.

Then Katherine took the dry cereal she was eating, dumped it into the potty, and began eating. … sigh…

I think we may have a problem.

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Dave’s Gardening Corner: Planting Seedlings

There are two ways to plant: from seeds and from existing plants. I’m not talking about cuttings either, I’m talking going to the store and buying a flat of plants. Planting from seeds is more difficult, takes longer, and requires a lot of space. Typically, you’d plant your seeds well in advance of your regular planting season because they need time to grow before you transplant them to your garden. This means you’ll need to raise them indoors in special conditions. Plus, some plants, like petunias, have seeds that are far too small to work with comfortably. Trust me, unless you have a sunroom or green house, it’s just not worth it. Planting from an existing plant or seedling is a cheap way that will save you time and energy.

Picking out my plants

Step one is to pick a plant you like. Don’t waste time planting marigolds if you dislike them. When choosing a plant, most people make the mistake of picking the one with the most flowers. Don’t. A flower in bloom is a flower that has just spent a lot of energy creating that flower. Depending on the flower, such as an iris, that may be its only bloom this year, and you don’t want to waste it. Pick one that has excellent foliage, is good-sized, and healthy looking. Not only will you get a healthier plant, but you’ll get bigger and better blooms sooner.

Planting my plants

Once you get the plants home (if you’re in a colder climate, make sure you protect them by wrapping them in a bag or something), you should plant them immediately. The containers the plants came in are not good enough. The store puts them in the smallest, cheapest container they can, and the plant is probably root-bound. Get a pot that easily holds the plant. Personally, I am a big fan of the ceramic pots since they have excellent drainage, work well both indoors and out, and aren’t that expensive. At the start, the pot will probably look much too big, but remember that your plant is going to grow. Make sure your pot has holes in the bottom for drainage, or your plants will suffer root rot.

Prepare the new pot by lining the bottom and outside edges with good potting soil. If I think the plant needs it, I’ll sprinkle in a touch of fertilizer, but most new potting soil is already well-fortified. Next, pull the plant out of its container by the base of the stem. I personally like to turn the plant upside down and catch it when it slips out of the pot. I think it puts much less strain on the plant. Take a knife and lightly slice the outside edges of the root ball. This will force the plant to explore the new soil. If you don’t do this step, the roots will take much longer to grow out, and your plant will be stunted for a while.

Finally, put the plant in the prepared pot. Don’t add any more soil to the top of the plant. It only needs soil on top if the roots are exposed. Level off the height of the soil by adding additional soil to the sides and raising the root ball. If your soil is loose, it will compact over time, and you may need to go back and add more soil around the edges. Once the pot is ready, give it a good watering, and remember to empty out the catch basin of any overflow.

If you want immediate growth, your very last step should be to remove the flowers on any plant that will bloom again. Your plant needs to focus on growing right now, and leaving the blooms there is just a waste of energy. Besides, plants that are susceptible to stress (roses come to mind immediately) will drop their flowers anyway. They blooms will come back, and your plant needs that energy right now for survival.

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Dave’s Gardening Corner: Proper Watering

One of the most common mistakes someone makes in gardening is watering. Often the problem is a case of underwatering, but some also overwater.

Underwatering

Underwatered plants are easy to spot; the leaves are brittle, curled, and dry. Sometimes the leaves become droopy. If that doesn’t help, a sure sign of underwatering is that your flowers absolutely will not bloom when they are underwatered. Blooming is an act of procreation, and like any living creature, procreation is not on the “to do list” when one is thirsty.

The Cure: Easy, start watering your plants more often or with greater quantity. If you use planters, you should water your plants until the catch basin under the planter starts to fill with water. If you are indoors, empty out the catch basin. If you are outdoors, the water will probably evaporate before it causes problems. Remember that each plant requires different amounts of water, so do some homework.

Overwatering

Many people make the mistake of loving their plants too much. Some approach watering with the idea that if one inch of water is good, two inches is better. Uh… no. Think of the types of plants that like to live in water-rich areas like swamps. Is that what you are aiming for? Thought not. When you overwater a plant, the roots become susceptible to a variety of diseases. The most common is root rot. With root rot, the roots decay. No roots equals dead plant. It’s that simple.

Root rot shows up in varied ways. One of the most common is that the soil will be moist, but the plant will start to die. In advanced stages, the stocks of the plant become squishy as they bloat with water. By this stage, only an immediate and drastic change will save the plant. Unfortunately, the change is just as likely to stress the plant and kill it anyway. If you get to this point, your best bet is to stop wasting your time on saving an already dead plant and go get a new one. Don’t feel bad; everyone kills a plant from overwatering (I have). Fortunately, overwatering is more common in potted plants. Other plants pretty much have a million places for the water to go. The one exception is if you have a heavy clay soil or other soil type that holds in the water well.

The Cure: Number one… STOP WATERING SO MUCH!!! When you do water, only water until the catch basin starts to fill with water, and make sure to empty it. When you use planters, the water tends to sit on that bottom inch of soil, and it will kill the roots if you let it sit too long or too often. Emptying the catch basin lets that soil drain. Again, do your research and figure out how much water the plant needs, and then give it that much water. If your pot does not have a drainage hole in the bottom, you need to add one immediately. All that water just gathers on the bottom, goes fetid, and rots the roots.

Lawn Watering

This is a major pet peeve of mine. Most people put down far too much water on their lawns. Your average lawn requires a maximum of an inch or two a week, and most lawns in our environmentally-conscious time require much less. Our lawn requires only half an inch. With proper watering, I can lay down that much water in about 15 minutes twice a week. On the other hand, I’ve seen some people put down upwards of eight or even nine inches of water a week! That’s a slight case of overkill.

Overwatering your lawn causes several problems.

• Shallow Roots: a heavily watered lawn has no reason to dig deep for the roots. Not only does that make your lawn weaker as far as wear and tear, it also makes it more susceptible to diseases. Worse yet, a lawn with shallow roots will end-up requiring more water because you haven’t trained it to drill deep for its own. At the first sign of a dry spell, your grass will roll over and die.
• Environmental Pollution: one of the biggest polluters today is irrigation runoff. Runoff includes many chemicals and nutrients from fertilizers and other wastes. These wastes do what they are designed to do, make plants grow. Unfortunately, because it is runoff, it happens in the wrong places. Overgrowths of plants in streams, rivers, and lakes destroy the natural environment and even kill off fish populations.
• Waste: contrary to popular believe, water isn’t a consistent, renewable resource. It is limited to what we have right here, right now. You cannot “create” water. You cannot “plant” water plants that produce water. You cannot, on your own power, “make” water. Use it wisely.

If you really want to be wise with your lawn watering, follow these simple tips:

• Water at night or during the cooler hours of the day because there is less evaporation.
• Only water until you start to see run off. That means the soil is saturated. If you put on more water, it will just run away.
• If you really want to conserve, water by hand and put exactly the amount of water on the places you need it.
• Plant native species and limit your green carpet of grass to what you need. Grass is an awful consumer of water.
• If you must have grass (and I don’t blame you) make sure you use a drought-resistant or low water use grass.
• Take the time to care for your lawn. Why water dandelions? If you are going to water, you might as well water what you want to see, right?
• Use sprinklers that have a low trajectory when spraying the water. The higher the water is sprayed, the more of it that evaporates.

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Harry Potter: Where It All Began

Anyone who knows me well, knows that I am fascinated by Harry Potter. Harry Potter is an important part of my life for many reasons.

First and foremost, adolescent literature is my favorite genre. I am very well-read in many genres, but no other genre attacks social ills and problems like adolescent literature does. In some ways, the genre itself defines that necessity. Other genres allow you to dance around a topic and explore the fringes, but adolescent literature by nature has to attack the heart of the problem and attack it quickly. We are, after all, talking about teens here. I also enjoy adolescent literature for the length (generally a few hundred pages tops). There is something nice to being able to sit down to a short book and finish it in one sitting.

Back to Harry Potter….

I was quite anti-Harry Potter at one time. I wasn’t necessarily opposed to the books, but I was opposed to the mob mentality that surrounded the books. I do not like to follow the crowd simply to be “in,” and that is what Harry Potter felt like to me. I knew I would one day read them, but I wanted to make sure I read them on my timetable, not the mob’s. When I did finally read the first book, it was because of a class assignment. I was so enamored with it that I read the remaining four books (there were only five at the time) over the next three days. I then turned around and read them again over the following week. Since that time, I have read the first five around fifteen times, and the sixth around five. I’ve even gone so far as to read them out of order, in reverse order, and so on. I’m almost embarrassed to admit that I even have multiple copies of each book: one for reading, one for display. Eventually, I hope to add the collector editions. And please don’t even ask about my wands (I have five).

So why Harry?

To be honest, I’m not really sure. Harry is a powerfully emotional character that is quite attractive to our souls. So is Hermoine and Ron. Among the three of them, it would be difficult for the average reader not to find a comparison. The supporting cast (Hagrid, Dumbledore, and so on) are also easily recognizable and, therefore, comfortable. Even the bad guys (Draco, Snape, and Voldemort) are familiar. But it goes much deeper than that.

I think Harry Potter calls to our own dreams and aspirations. Everyone who has never once even dreamed of being able to fly, do magic, or see a dragon please raise your hand. Thought so. But that can’t be it either, can it?

No, I think that the reason that Harry Potter called to me and to others is because it is a story of a little boy, an underdog, who is innately good. He is the purity and innocence of our own childhoods. I think most of us see in him what we see (or saw) in ourselves.

Perhaps, that is why I am personally so fond of adolescent literature in general: it is an escape from the present woes and frustrations of being an adult.

Oh yeah, and JK Rowling is a fantastic author.

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Opt-Out of Pre-screened Offers of Credit

My brother recently asked how to opt-out of getting all those credit card offers. It’s really rather simple, and if you haven’t done it yet, I highly recommend it. A credit card application, even one that has been ripped up, is an open invitation to having your identity stolen.

The Opt-Out program is a program that, much like the Do Not Call Registry for telemarketing, prohibits the three credit bureaus from including your name when the credit companies come calling. To put it another way, credit card companies use the bureaus much like we use a grocery store. They browse through the aisles pulling names that they then contact with pre-approved offers of credit. The Opt-Out program takes you off the grocery shelf.

There are two ways to remove your name: by phone and by mail. I’ve done both. The phone method is extremely difficult and painful. The automated machine has what can only be called a hearing problem, and you will spend far more time correcting your information than inputting it. Plus, you can only do one person at a time. Mail is much easier since it removes the communication barrier, and you can opt-out multiple people on the same letter provided that everyone signs.

Once you opt-out, it takes a while for the offers to stop. For us, we found that two of the credit bureaus responded within two weeks; the third took about two months. The number of offers we received, around five a day, quickly declined to a slow trickle and, now, a complete stop. Opting-out lasts five years, so I highly recommend going back and opting-out again around the four-year mark. That would eliminate the small window where credit card companies would see your information while the bureaus complied.

If you would like to opt-out, just grab the very next offer you receive in the mail. By law the opt-out instructions must be included somewhere on the offer (normally the very bottom or on the back). If securing your identity isn’t enough reason for you to spend a few minutes to opt-out, try this on for size. Every day, Americans receive enough junk mail that, when processed, we could power 400,000 homes.

Saving your identity and the world all at the same time…. What could be better?

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